It's been on my mind
For a month or two now
I'm not any different from who I used to be,
Just one secret down.
As a kid, I wanted to be the strongest girl in class; I wanted to hand-wrestle better than any of the boys, and have them stare at me in admiration. They did. I could beat all of them in a single sitting.
she's a habit. an 8 am class that I take, a 5 pm phone call that I make, my best/worst muse.
By the time I was 9 years old, I had decided that Nikhil from Daddy would break my heart at the tender age of 18 - leaving me floundering in a state of melodramatic, bangle-breaking depression - until I was ready to be rescued from Heartbreak™ and my own female fragility, by my superhero: Raj from DDLJ. But alas, my childhood fantasy remained unfulfilled.
I am taught by these women
fortunate enough to have had them raise me
whether in my house or oceans away
Over the years, I’ve experienced a plethora of WLW crushes of fluctuating degrees – which usually range from sugary-sweet and ecstatic to mind-numbingly painful. Upon introspection, I’ve been able to pinpoint 6 crushes that almost all WLW experience at some point in their queer journey.
When I joined the course, I was excited to share my experiences with the class. But with time I realised not everyone was interested. Most of them didn't interact with me, asked questions, or exchange their experiences.
If I wasn’t feeling like shit because I was turned on by girls (one girl in particular), I’m sure I would have found something else to hate myself for. I was young, female, loud, and had a body. Society does this to you. It moulds you till you are all soft woundable spots, and then it makes you kick yourself.