Lack Of Social-Lezzing

No offence to my straight friends. I love them to death and honestly, couldn’t have asked for a better set of human beings who have been nothing else but fantastic with the entire coming out episode.

Whoever said that tough times only exhibit the true essence of an individual, couldn’t be more accurate. It’s quite amusing when I look back at the different kinds of reactions I received (though I will admit they were so not the high-drama voltage kind I expected, damn Bollywood I tell ya!). Some were initially shocked but within minutes settled in with the reality, some had the “so what’s the big deal?” kinda look plastered all over their face and some, surprisingly (well not really) said “I always knew it”. The last response was mostly from Gay friends (with the exception of one hetro woman), this Gaydar thingy, believe you me does exist. All in all – they placed me (our friendship) – before their inhibitions, if any.

Anyway the crux of this post isn’t the above, the point I want to make is that even though I completely enjoy hanging out with my straight friends, I find myself at times craving for some social-lezzing (lack of a better word). Nothing on the lines of forming a Ghetto, where a minority group holds weekly discussions on all the things done bad unto them. What I am talking about is simple mingling of women who love women. A social meet-up where wearing one’s sexuality on the sleeve is not an issue, where sharing of personal stories can be done with much ease, where sighing over a hot pair legs that walks in won’t result in eyebrows being raised up high and where making a list of desired Indian (women) celebs is as much fun as playing a game of Housie. In short, a place where being a lesbian is the coolest thing.

In the above aspect it wouldn’t be wrong to say that Indian gay men have it a lot easier. Practically in all metro cities they have thriving social hubs, for example in Mumbai there is Bombay Dost a group which organizes weekly meet-ups, monthly picnics and not to forget, rocking weekend parties. Not denying that there aren’t any lesbian groups across the country but mostly all of them concentrate on providing emotional and/or judicial support. And even if there is a social event planned, it’s done so discreetly that you could be freaking living next door and yet be clueless. Though one can’t really blame them (gender & sexuality discrimination, family pressure, police brutality, lack of financial support and God knows what not).

Ironic isn’t it? On one hand we have gay men for whom visibility is no longer an issue. And on the other side we have Indian lesbians who in spite of falling under the same Homosexuality bracket, for the society, even in this day-n-age are considered to be a breed non-existing.

About the author


Now 30, 100% shudh desi lesbian. Likes living large, and on the edge. Dislikes stagnation, fence sitting and hypocrites. Lives in a bubble of joy, with occasional lapses into drama queendom. Currently nursing a massive crush on actress Chitrangada Singh (kind of eerie, her resemblance to the late Smita Patil, don’t you think?). Aspires to build a fully functional support system for the Gaysi community in India. And most importantly, top the 'Hottest eligible desi-lezzie' list one bright sunny day.