Comments on: A Conversation

By: Broom

Broom — Tue, 05 Jan 2010 00:55:43 +0000

@Chicklet: I didn’t mean that everyone in India is a Raj Thackeray. I was merely pointing out that just as people discriminate against Indians when they’re abroad, there are people in India who discriminate against other Indians too. To say that my view of India is limited to its problems is also unfair – I wouldn’t miss it achingly, if that were the case.
I hope with all my heart that India becomes a place that accepts us and our kind in the way Canada does. I hope that someday I can think of bringing up my child there – openly, not like a dirty secret.
Honestly, I’d love moving back to India and wouldn’t mind living mostly in the closet with TG, if we didn’t plan on having a child. I can’t risk losing our child to archaic laws that don’t recognise the fact that two women and a child can be a family just like a man, a woman and a child (or 2 men and a child).
I know that change has to begin somewhere & I’m probably too selfish to sacrifice what I have in order to help bring about that change.
btw, my mother is a doctor – and she still doesn’t accept my homosexuality.

I hope this new year brings her a lot closer to accepting me for who I am. I also hope this new year helps you and me to come to a middle ground or just agree to disagree!

By: Chicklet

Chicklet — Sun, 27 Dec 2009 12:49:20 +0000

@Broom I’m not talking about any place in particular but to say that Indians are accepted & given equal rights in the west would be a lie.
Your view of India seems to be limited to its problems. You are not considering the wise & intelligent people. where we have Raj Thackeray , we also have Anjali Gopalan!
There is discrimination because we want to believe in equality. but don’t you think equality is a myth? ” Every human being is a category unto himself and the day we accept & recognize the uniqueness of each individual; all this would disappear ”.
There exists a POSSIBILITY that India would change & accept all communities. My mother is a product of this very culture & if she can accept the fact that I’m gay; so can others.
I guess, all we need is a change of focus. For long; we have been focusing on the issues & problems. what we need is a vision & a belief in that vision. This divide is created by us & therefore can be removed by us. Challenging but not impossible

By: MJ

MJ — Thu, 24 Dec 2009 04:52:12 +0000

Hope pe hi toh Duniya kayam hai

By: jane doe

jane doe — Wed, 23 Dec 2009 17:04:23 +0000

i agree. the prejudice is pissing off. as hell. being a south indian living in delhi i’ve faced prejudice there, and i’m facing prejudice in bangalore for not being south indian enough.but not everyone is like that, not everyone discriminates. people feel threatened by change, threatened by anything that is unknown to them. it’s not personal, its just the way they react to the unknown. people are gay and living very public lives. things weren’t good in the 1960s in India, and now TIME magazine calls it the best place to live in. So Dear Broom, have faith in people. Have faith in your country. people will come around. they always do.

By: Broom

Broom — Wed, 23 Dec 2009 15:27:28 +0000

@Chicklet: Not sure which place you’re referring to, but here in Canada I’ve never been treated badly or been ‘despised’ for being Indian. This is an amazing country that’s very welcoming, in general, of minorities.
Of course Canada has problems, like every other place. But in comparison: as a South Indian living in Bombay I would have to listen to Raj Thackeray telling me that my city is not mine, because I’m not Maharashtrian.
There is more prejudice to deal with in India, whether we like to admit it or not. And it’s not necessarily limited to prejudice towards the gay community.

By: Chicklet

Chicklet — Mon, 21 Dec 2009 17:20:30 +0000

@Broom i know what u mean. but i can’t seem to answer the question of where our home really is, if acceptance as a gay person comes from a place which often despises us as indian. seems like being spliced between two unrealities…

@jane doe yes things are changing. our society has a potential to change.i have hope.

By: jane doe

jane doe — Tue, 15 Dec 2009 17:42:57 +0000

i love India, and I can never think of moving abroad. even the thought of higher studies isn’t appealing.
And yes, there is prejudice. A lot of it. But that’s true of everything. Dark, short, fat, South Indian, muslim,poor- everyone of us has faced discrimination. Some of us for all of the above. When you’re gay you face a little extra.
But honestly, it ain’t all that bad. My twitter feed today had updates about someone’s same sex crush today.
Things are changing.
And it’s our country, and our people. Which means its our job to help bring change. If everyone left, there would be no Naz foundation, there would still be 377.

By: Broom - Editor

Broom - Editor — Sun, 06 Dec 2009 16:57:00 +0000

I miss India. It’s not obvious all the time, but suddenly, when I’m least expecting it, a smell, a colour, a sound, will wake up the part of me that I’ve forced to sleep and make me crave India with a force that always surprises me.

But I’m not ready to go back, even though my American girlfriend would totally support a move there.

I can’t imagine living in the closet after having lived this life of freedom here in Canada and in UK.