A version of this post also appeared on Broombox.
My girlfriend & I moved to our shiny new flat about two months ago. Our home is still under the tyrannical reign of builders who have very nasty toilet habits and keep saying ‘We’ll be done by the end of next week’ and then that next week never arrives.
We’re still living out of boxes and we’re absolutely broke. But we’re happy.
In earth-shattering news, it seems (note the tone of caution) that my parents are coming around to me being gay. It all started when The Girl was ill a few months ago. I asked my mother about what medicine to give her and a couple of days later, when I called her, she asked me if The Girl was feeling better. It was one of those moments when you know something big might have just happened but you don’t want to whoop and air punch because what if… it is all in your head & you’re really going to fall flat and break your teeth while whooping and punching the air?
So I didn’t let myself think of that incident as anything other than my mother being polite. A day later while I was speaking to my dad – he asked me how The Girl was feeling. ‘Fine.’, I said and moved on to other subjects, admirably refraining from whooping and air punching again. Such restraint!
Then, dear reader, my parents stopped changing the subject when I mentioned The Girl. Sometimes they even asked about her on their own. The Girl and I discussed this very cautiously. Either they are more accepting of us now or they are back to pretending that we’re room-mates – that’s the conclusion we came to and moved onto other subjects, once again not letting ourselves feel the utter relief of what this might mean.
The Girl has to go to India next month on a business trip and my dad wrote to her and said that she should go visit them. I don’t know how many more signs I’m waiting for, but it still feels too good to be true. I keep wondering what happened to make them extend the olive branch. The Girl thinks that it’s because we hosted some family members that were visiting, including my dad’s sister, for dinner one evening. It was the first time The Girl was meeting my family members (other than my cousins & parents) and they had a nice time & my aunt called my mom the next day and told her as much. TG thinks that this gave my parents the sense of security and relief at not being ostracized by family. She basically credits my aunt.
I credit John Abraham. Yes, John Abraham. My mother is a big fan of Koffee with Karan & this change in them started around the time this episode was aired (fast-forward to 10 minutes and 39 seconds):
So there we go – I can either thank my aunt or John Abraham for this change of heart that my parents are seemingly going through.
What this does tell me is that coming out of the closet was one of the hardest things I’ve done but I am so glad I did it. I might finally have a shot at having a normal family life that includes my parents.