Poem : Of Melancholia and Infinity

One more of those moments is all I want – just once more
And I will buy myself back from you
Instead, can you keep my essence forever – however long or short that moment lasts?

I can see you slowly disappearing from my life
As if awareness itself did not want you to be here
Or is it my mind playing tricks again?

Discombobulation seeps in taking your place
Even as I cling on to the smile of our first morning waking up together
I want to wake up to that smile every morning and end my days with sweet touch of your soft lips

One more of those moments is all I want – just once more
And I will buy myself back from you
Instead, can you keep my essence forever – however long or short that moment lasts?

If a drop of me found home in your ocean I would reach home, even as I wander around the world – a lost soul
And when the time comes we will meet on the other side as I pick up little droplets of me and merge with eternity
And explode into million little droplets and seep into million little pores of the fabric of eternity where we all truly belong
Where your smile of our first morning will become infinity itself
It’s all in a moment
Infinity is a moment, moment is infinity

So can I then cling on to you like a small particle in your DNA
or a tiny pulse in your beat
Or the sparkle in your gaze
Or vibe in your energy waves

Can stay there incognito in your unawareness if that exists
Or a tiny fragment in yours
Or can I be that snort in your laugh
Or an invisible piece on your broken tooth
A speckle on your skin
Or a freckle on face
Or a single white hair that you did not laser away

And witness your experiences
As a friend who’s always with you
And may be you could reign over my being like a fairy queen, an angel
That guides my experiences – like the faith that moves all things
Like a faith that guides river to the sea and sea to the ocean

I know it’s not a fair deal
For my whole ness is worth only your essence
My whole mess my awareness is for yours to take in exchange for even your nothingness
For the smile of our first morning is more than my wholeness
And that my love you shall never have back
Hanged I may be but I have stolen that moment from eternity to never return
Until the day we meet on the other side
Where I may show this smile to enter where the truth resides
Where you reside
And meet you one more time
In the hope that you may recognize that smile
In the hope that you may recognize us

 

About the author

Abha Talesara

Abha Talesara is a writer, director and producer with experience in three countries – UK, US and India. After producing her first feature in New York, she recently moved back to Bombay where she set up her own company – Breakthrough Productions. When she is not working, she spends her time in search of fine whiskey and good beer and of course, failing at making sense of the contemporary Indian culture.