What’s Your Pref?

Under tremendous pressure to find a suitable partner for myself, I finally took the plunge and created my profile on a popular gay dating app.

Man holding smartphone

You would think that being gay in India meant escaping some of the peskiest features of our society – matchmaking, registering on matrimonial websites, getting advice on finding the right partner, proposals by uncles/aunts/cousins, etc. The sad truth is, gay men & women are subject to all this and much more by well-meaning friends and relatives. Many of you who are out to your friends and families (and are single) may have experienced this at some point.

Under tremendous pressure to find a suitable partner for myself, I finally took the plunge and created my profile on a popular gay dating app. I must admit that I was foolish and naïve to expect miracles which would change my single status overnight. What I did not expect, however, was the fact that dating sites (at least in India) can be a great substitute for a comedy show. If you don’t believe me, read on…

Coffee threesomes
I’m here for secret relationship
Thanks for reading it guys
I was surprised when came to know that sex can be happened between guys. Guys can have feeling for guys. Welcome All married guys, lets have conservation, I don’t bite. or a lot can happen over coffee. Be happy n God bless. come for threesome

Well, you need to give it to the guy for originality. I almost believed him till I read the last line: “come for threesome.” And it is then that “Welcome All married guys” made sense!

No sex please, I am jobless!
hi I’m a young boy…
I like to make friendship with mature aged men only
I don’t like young
sex seeker stay away
koi hai yeha jo mujhe ek aacha sa job dilwa sake mechanical or automobile sector me…
I did diploma in mechanical but I have one reapper to be cleared..
I can’t do sex before getting job…

Can’t ‘do’ sex before getting job? This was a first, at least for me. Thank goodness I got my first job when I was 19, else I would have been consumed by guilt had I read this post. And I don’t even have a diploma in mechanical (whatever that is)!

Simply bananas
The best simple guy here
Looking for broad minded guy
Yes I got wild thick banana

Yes, although I am still scratching my head thinking of a possible connection between ‘broad minded guy’ and a ‘wild thick banana.’ Any guesses?

Seeking shuttlers (or maybe not)
Looking for badminton partner who can play badminton on weekends…anyone is welcome as it is just for play but he should play well.. Need some one here…looking for mature guy..looking for 30+ guys only.. place is not an issue..

This fellow probably gave ‘shuttlecock’ a whole new meaning. I wonder why else he would be looking for mature or 30+ guys to play badminton on weekends, that too when ‘place is not an issue!’

Making music, not love
i am single. but i want nice girl ya boy who sax with me

Poor guy was only trying to find a music partner, ‘girl ya boy’, who could ‘sax’ with him. We sometimes fail to respect a person’s real intentions, filthy minds that we are!

Mystic masseur
I’m give massage chest hand Nick sholer . I m paid 400 rs my place. your place 500 rs charge

Did he mean Nick Jonas? Only hope Priyanka Chopra-Jonas is not reading this, else Nick may have a lot of explaining to do.

Makes ‘buinesse’ sense!
Hi looking for someone who can invest in my buinesse concept I can relocate anywhere and I am pure top can compromise if offer is good

He should be careful, else someday he will find himself caught in a compromising position. The only fact which intrigued me was: what kind of ‘investors’ was he targeting on a gay dating app? I am also curious to know the return on investment he is offering!

Herd mentality
i m top… i need 40+ bottoms etc i m herd f****r

I totally get it. If he needs 40+ bottoms, it is quite obvious he has a herd mentality. He must have amazing stamina, though.

As you may have understood by now, my first stint on the dating app did not go quite as I expected it to. So here I am, back to being single again (and happily so), only till such time as my well-meaning friends start putting pressure on me again.

About the author

SimpleArt

A well-educated professional doing freelance work these days. I have recently changed my career path and am now training to be a professional photographer. I am single, live in Gurgaon and take each day as it comes. I consider myself blessed to be gay, but in the 40 years of my life I have never been in a relationship with another man. Every day I hope that I will find someone who I can call my own, but no luck so far! By nature I am a simple and peace-loving person who loves intimate dinners and conversations, good music and above all, beauty (whether it is a beautiful house, a beautiful person, beautiful countries, etc).
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