I transitioned when I was 18, so living as a woman for the last ten years has mostly eliminated the dysphoria I had from being pigeonholed into a male role, but I still have a strong sense of dysphoria about certain aspects of my body.
In the process of sorting through blurry, old memories and trying to over-analyse them, I found the answer in a game that most of us played when we were kids, “Ghar Ghar”.
In my 27 years of existence, I’ve embodied various personas and roles. Even today, I behave slightly differently in the office, around parents, at a party and when I’m alone in my room.
Papa, I have not been an ideal child. We have fought plenty over the choices I have made in life.
And then, I saw her for the first time…On a railway station in the midnight, her heading off to marry her love; I knew we were in it together for the long haul.
Pride was not only interpreted as being proud of one-self, but it was also about collectively standing up against pervasive shame.
Pride marches are about acceptance. People from a wide range of spectrum come together for ONE DAY in a year to celebrate their existence and their individuality.
Whether I love doing drag, I am yet to figure.
Everyone around me seemed elated, not a single care in the world, and a fire in their eyes, a storm brewing.
The next Awadh Pride march will be held on 11th February, 2018. This will be my first pride and I hope to make it an unforgettable experience.
I want to be swept off my feet. I want to fall hook, line and sinker. I want to marry someone, because I want to and not because I am on a deadline.
What I also discovered was that unless you wanted to be the guest, threesomes weren’t something to rush into.
This year, what if we set aside the clichés and came up with some fun resolutions, ones that you might actually see through?
Today, I am not stuck in what you think of me-
This exhausting, endless loop of trans-misogyny
Not broken and what I ought to be
With their outrageous and extraordinary personalities, drag queens show us how to be a bit extra without apology.
I gave birth to a child, they make him a bit of a man with each passing night.
I realised that my family being accepting was a privilege because there are so many others who would not be as accepting. But should it be a privilege?
I have fallen in love enough times to be exhausted by it already.
You know, you want it all. The attainable and otherwise.
And then one day, I kissed a girl. I do not know how it came to be. I kissed a girl I did not even like.