The French Open
For an eligible single gay man in Delhi, trying to date another single gay eligible man could be like an opening game at the French Open, but with a simple twist - you don't know the rules, or horror of horrors maybe there are no rules. Finding sex in this city is easy, but dating, well that's a completely different 'ball game'. What makes this game even more adventurous is the absolute lack of any rulebook. The straight man has tons of help when it comes to knowing the rules of dating - media, guidebooks and plenty of opportunity to practice...for the gay man, there's nothing. You just keep serving and hope you get lucky and win the match...
So what does a gay man do when he wants to date? What are the rules of gayting?
The most likely places where a single gay man in Delhi would get the opportunity to meet other single men are the weekly parties at a couple of Delhi nightclubs. The scene is fairly typical - dim lights, haze of cigarette smoke, thumping music and gyrating bodies, all creating a slightly surreal, mythical scene for the arrival of Mr right. Unfortunately he never does. Most players play doubles, they come with friend/boyfriend/fuck buddy/sugar daddy/someone they met outside the club. Others play in groups of random payers. It's hard to figure out if there are any single players around at all. When you do finally find someone who you think is willing to play, the match doesn't go as you hope it would. While there are many sly looks exchanged from across the room, back and forth , back and forth, the two players rarely come to the net to shake hands, introduce themselves, have a chat and say 'well played mate, how about a drink?" it's shocking how many guys at these parties never go beyond eye contact or when they do, it's inevitably about a hook-up. No one expects people to have an intellectual discussion about solving the world's problems in the middle of a loud and noisy nightclub but come on, is a simple 'hey' and a witty one liner too much too ask for? But surprisingly no one wants to follow up eye contact with an initiative to talk. No one wants to follow up a great serve with a good volley. It seems they are only interested in big serves. But maybe no one knows the rules of the game, what are the rules of this game? - what should one guy do when interested in another? Should we casually smile and walk over and tell the person he's the cutest in the club? should we ask for a light or should we offer a drink instead? or should we serve big and come gay to the point and ask as one guy recently did to me 'do you suck?'. Sadly nobody knows the answers. We will have to make our own rules in this new game as we go along. Let's hope whatever rules we play by, we end up meeting our nadal in the finals....
gay, set, match to us !
