In all the discourse around colorism, it always comes up that South Asian heterosexual men and South Asian heterosexual women find each other less attractive or worthy of a relationship and marriage the darker their skin. This sometimes leads to the conversation of South Asian heterosexual men having a preference for White women (remember "Rock n Roll Soniye"?). My question is, of course, where do queer people fall into all of this? While my discussion of the exoticism of South Asian queer women focused of White queer women's treatment of South Asian queer women, my intent here is to highlight dynamics that play within the South Asian community.
At the start of this summer I started the final internship for my Master of Social Work program. I’m placed at the youth detention center where I anticipated the opportunity to work with minority youth, however I wasn’t sure if I was going to need to or be able to advocate for queer youth in the system.
What if a person is truly happy with the body they have yet present themselves in a role that is not socially conforming? Shouldn't trans folks be allowed to define who and what they are?
The love between two women reaches a point of being far deeper than any other as it encircles its self in not just being lovers but also sharing, shopping, spa …
A month or so ago, Five of us ...yes! Five spanking HOT gaysis got together one Saturday across 4 timezones for a near-2-hour Skype call discussion on Coming Out. After a ridiculously amazing conversation that was 4-5 podcasts worth covering the queer spectrum from end to end on we find out that...
Your Gay friend decides to get married to a girl, due to parental pressure. His fiancee has no clue. What would you do?
My first sexual experience, with my first boyfriend in high school, was brought upon me with coercion. This sexual experience did not happen on my own terms. This doesn’t mean I didn’t eventually enjoy it or that I didn’t still fall head-over-heels for him, but this wasn’t how or when I had wanted it to happen.
When you share your inner most self you allow for recognition to happen. Sometimes we are afraid of being seen for what we are and this in turn causes us to fear being available to a world we long to enter. The greater damage is how we cease to be a vivid presence to our own selves. We choose the wrong mirrors and have to deal with false reflections.
The one memory from rush week that stands out the most is from the fondue night. We had the fondue night at one of the sister’s houses and she asked her straight roommates if they wanted any fondue. One of them responded with something along the lines of “ewwww I’m not sharing fondue with y’all and your vagina fingers!” Yes.
Our regular public meetings are informal support spaces for queer youth. And we wholeheartedly invite participation from everyone who believes in what we stand for! This is your space to speak your mind, share your experiences with respect to coming out to family, friends, realization of your sexuality, your specific interests or what you exp...ect from a queer youth support group like QCI.
I may be a somewhat bitter person at times, but if there is one thing I am an optimist about, it is trust. I believe that if someone holds such a place in our lives that we have entrusted them with our friendship, there is a mutual respect born that builds a foundation for trust and loyalty.
When I first realized I was into girls, and only girls, things seemed so clear and easy. I had finally figured out the reason behind the unhappiness and discontentment in my past relationships. I finally embraced a significant part of myself, and in that moment, I was finally able to piece together who I was, instead of who I had always wanted myself to be.
Appearance has become such a big part of queer existence and identity for women. Fitting certain check marks on the list of common attire and appearance often helps queer women find each other in the sea of unavailable heterosexuals. The main aspect of appearance I want to talk about is gaysi women’s hair, because I love hair and its complexities fascinate me.
While I tried my hardest to be out and proud during that relationship with a man, I have now realized just how much I was benefiting from the heterosexual privilege. Even though my politics and identity were queer, many straight people treated me with the privileges of a fellow straight person since they saw that I was dating a man.
In a time when I was an ardent believer in a certain philosophy, I trusted flowers to be my messengers to the Higher Consciousness, and in a need to supplicate …
I wrote you fairytales. Fairytales I thought you dreamed.
You did not dream so.
I wrote you kisses. Kisses I thought were wanted.
You did not want so.
I wrote …
I guess I always knew I was different from other boys, I just don’t know why I felt different. My earliest crush on a guy was in my first year of high school I was 12. I remember thinking about this guy all the time and fantasizing about him when I got home after school and at night. I didn’t think too much of it back then, although I am pretty sure I thought there was something odd, this was partly because I knew that I couldn’t tell anyone and I didn’t, particularly not my parents.
What is the most negative thought people have of Gaysis in India ?
They are a bad influence on everyone especially youth.
They spread HIV/AIDs.
They like drugs, sex and
“I remember how being young and black and gay and lonely felt. A lot of it was fine, feeling I had the truth and the light and the key, but a lot of it was purely hell.”
This quote made me giggle a little, even though I don’t think it was supposed to be funny, just because I can understand the sentiment - from my own perspective, at least.
So when I realised my Queerness was not going anywhere, I was shocked, ashamed and confused. It was intense because I was also ashamed of being a TamBram. ... it took me a whole decade to understand that being Queer and being TamBram can mutually exist.