So the guy is Gay. I know it. You know it. Your mama knows it. Your neighbors know it. Your cousins know it. Kanta bhen knows….okay maybe this is stretching it too far. But you get the point, right?
Every single soul belonging to the Page 3 circuit is aware; they gossip, link him with several men (King Khan being the favorite but of course), pick on his dressing sense, his feminine gestures, etc etc. And yet when it comes to openly talking about it, they all seem to shy away. A brilliant example of what we call an Open Secret.
The other day I was once again asked; don’t you think Karan Johar should step out of the closet and thereby be morally responsible towards the Gaysi Community?
My reply – As my darling mama would say *ghanta*. In simple words meaning, fuck shit.
You see for me it’s a simple Math. Ideally people should judge one another as per same standards…as I mentioned, ideally. But we don’t and that’s a different story.
We the Queer folks proclaim that it’s not the world’s business as to know what happens in our bedrooms. Many of us find it convenient to stay within the closet; be it because of family, work, insecurities and reasons galore. And there are some of us who are out to only those we find important, as for world, we couldn’t give a flying crap.
Now looking at Mr. Johar from the same perspective; to me the man has done no wrong.
(Assuming) He is out to those who truly matter but plays along the – Find me a hot woman – charade, just like others from the Gay world. He doesn’t want to risk his successful business empire especially in the hands of the so-called Moral Brigade bastards. Not that they are making his life any easier off late, kabhi Mumbai-Bombay bukwaas toh sometimes Kareena ka (no) libaaz – one can only imagine the calamities that could fall upon him if he started yelling out “Gay, haanji haan main hoon”.
And most important of all, who the shit are we to dig our noses in his bedroom activities.
But yes, if he decides to then it would be awesome. Any form of encouragement is always appreciated and his coming out will surely encourage many more.
The only request I have is – boss please no more Kanta bhens, no more stereotype Dostanas and no more gay mockery in exchange for Box Office bling bling. Represent us in the righteous sense or don’t bother at all.
Hope you find a nice puppy paneer for yourself and as for the sexy chories, give me a tingle.
Being a fiction has always been useful to us. We all live somewhere between mask & face.
In all this talk of breaking the silence, we fail to realise that we risk the space which appears ‘normal’.
But, muteness is an option only for those who can pass as heterosexuals; it is of no use to those whose androgyny speaks for them & are therefore easy targets for discrimination. So ,even though increasing visibility will certainly make lives more difficult , beyond this lies the prospect of solidarity & freedom. don’t u think so ?
But we should reject the notion of a hierarchy which valorizes the ability or desire of individual men/women to be ‘out’. coz in the end , its a matter of choice.
I don’t completely agree. KJo has more than enough money for the next 20 generations. So his closeted existence is not completely justified.
At the very least he can stop lying about being straight.
If everyone stayed in the closet out of fear of repercussions, we would have no gay rights.
I don’t believe in forced ‘outing’. There are situations where being ‘out’ can literally get you killed or raped (look up the phenomenon of ‘corrective rape’ for lesbians in South Africa). On the other hand, those of us who have the support networks and financial stability to be out without serious consequences, should be out.
I also agree that what people do in their bedrooms is their business. However, what irks me is when the bedroom-privacy argument is used only for sexual minorities. I don’t want to know the details of what my straight friends do in the bedroom either – but in their case, privacy regarding their sexual *acts* is not conflated with their sexual *identities*.
E.g., if a straight woman casually mentions her boyfriend/husband in a non-sexual context, the general reaction wouldn’t be ‘oh, let’s not go there – don’t flaunt your straightness – we don’t want to know what you do in the bedroom’. I agree, though, that there is a difference between ‘neither confirming nor denying’ one’s sexuality to the world at large, and *actively* reinforcing stereotypes, a la Johar.
Karan Johar has the choice of advertising his sexuality or not. We are nobodys to dictate what’s morally right or wrong. Hypocricy is what we thrive on.
@Sneha – You know I should you just scrap up the entire post and state this one line – its a matter of choice – everything said in simplest fashion. 🙂
@Others – Well money or no money, security or no security, we are nobody to decide what’s best for Him or what’s best he could do for us. It’s his choice and lets just leave it to that.
Yes, sure it’s a person’s choice to come out or not to come out… just like it was a person’s choice to fight for freedom or stay in bondage in aperthid driven South Africa, or British ruled India.
Action and Inaction, taking the easy way out or standing up for your self, is always a choice…
Thankfully there were enough people before ’47 who had made the honerable choice…
and here’s hoping that even today there are enough people to stand up for who they are and not hide behind the “excuse” of “making a choice”!!