Being a good girl takes work. Ask me. I’ve done it all my life.
The Good girl wakes up early.
The Good girl gets home work done.
The Good girl gets ace grades
The Good girl gets married
The Good girl works her ass off.
The Good girl does not drink
The Good girl is waiting for ‘the one’
But somewhere behind the good girl,
I have discovered has been lying dormant the bad girl.
The Bad girl who wants to smoke for no reason
The Bad girl who wants to get high on more than life!
The Bad girl who wants to explore every attraction.
The Bad girl who wants to say ‘yes, yes, yes!’
The Bad girl who wants to flirt her ass off and make goo goo eyes!
The Bad girl who wants to indulge her lust!
The Bad girl who wants somebody else’s love
I’ve always yo-yoed.
Between the two extremes
Between the bad, and the good
guilt making me swing,
overpowering all else…
But at 32, life’s not about
bad or good.
good or bad.
I am realising, that it’s just about being true to yourself. It’s truly about having no rules, no wrongs or rights except what your heart says is all-right.
Increasingly, it’s become about about allowing myself to flow with the tide… Be it of passion in pursuing a new hobby which may not lead anywhere or discovering the difference between lust and love. Between the now and the forever which may never happen.
Most importantly, it’s becoming all about growing up, about realising the infinitesimally fleetingness of time. About knowing that if I didn’t take up this moment for what it was — it would never come back.
I am realizing, it’s about allowing yourself to roll with the dice, playing your hand, the best you can. It’s about saying yes to all I desire… and no to stereotype!
i think this is totally awesome .. :))))
i just loved it XOXO
Liked in particular the bits about saying no to stereotype and having no rules. Amen to that !
bad gurls are so much better …..
awesome post. you’d make any good girl want to go bad. 🙂
Bad girls are so much better.
I remember a while ago u wrote a post about a must have list for lesbian woman. At number 3 you said every lesbian woman should have a younger woman to love her from breast to toe. I would like to volunteer for that position if it hasn’t been taken…:) 🙂
Thanks for the offer. Will take u up on it:) Sooooooooooooooon!
At, 21 I think life is still, more or less, about being good the way you defined it. When I was younger, I was even good-er. Perhaps, even I am getting badd-er with age! (Though, no matter how good I have been, I’ve NEVER EVER thought about being heterosexually married, not even when I hardly knew I was gay!)
But having imbibed some traits of ‘bad-ness’, even I think that it’s not about being good or bad. It’s about being true to oneself. Also, now my definition of ‘bad’ is more objective and dependent on my own thinking, unlike being culturally, stereotypically, or parentally influenced.
So, I used to think that flirtatious on-and-off affairs are not good. I’ve never had one, however, now I think that even if I have one, it’s okay. But, as I said, ‘good’ or ‘bad’ has to be defined objectively. So, if I let a flirtatious affair drain my emotional energy and sanity, it’s bad. Period. Health-wise, smoking is bad. Period. Anyhow, even then, one can’t help being a little ‘bad’ sometimes!
So yes, your heart and your mind should lead the way, rather than culture or stereotypes. C’mon, the same ‘culture’ had once made me believe that being gay was ‘bad’, and I am so happy that I did choose to be bad after all 🙂
TT, I am ready whenever you are. That offer has no expiry date. It is timeless just like your beauty and personality will forever be timeless. My love for you will also be forever timeless. So i’m ready to be your love slave and cater to your every whim. Your every demand is my command. 🙂
If there are many contenders for the position, i am ready to be interviewed and pass all the tests needed to be in the position to satisfy request number 3. 🙂
Till then i’m going to work on myself so i meet all your other requirements. If not i’ll keep trying, i’ll still love you from a distance..even if my love for you will remain forever unrequited.
Also, could we modify your request no. 3 and make it from tip to toe rather than breast to toe. I feel its unfair that some part of you would miss out on the loving, Only if its ok with you. Plus i’d like to gaze adoringly into your eyes..even if just for a while.
Bad girl
Let me take this off this comment space:)
And write to u!
Thanks for the reply back. I didn’t expect it. That one of the hottest writers on gaysi would offer to write back to me. I think i need to pinch myself to make sure its real. Really? I can write back to you. How can i write back to you? If only we could send personal messages on gaysi. But do you have twitter or something like that? Only if you’re comfortable with exchanging that with me.
I have a small crush on you. If this was real life i would probably never own up to it but it being the net makes me more likely to open up about that type of stuff. 🙂
tc
Badgrrl
Way to go, Badgrrl!
….perhaps, it’s time to rechristen you as ‘Boldgrrl’ !!!
Thanks Sunrise for your kind words. I don’t know if i am worthy of such a nickname at the moment. I mean i’m only really bold online but in real life i get a little nervous and shy when telling someone about how i feel.
TT – This is well said. Totally relate to it! Keep writing 🙂
TT – this is well said. Totally relate to it! I am so over stereotypes and pre conceived notions and judgement! Keep writing 🙂