Love is so misunderstood. We cloak it with our endless expectations, willing the other person to change and bend to our will and yet we call it ‘love’ for the other one. We demand a certain attitude, we beg for openness and the ability to understand, we hope for gentleness – and yet, we may never show any of that ourselves, when it is called for, when the needle spins and points to us.
But there are moments, when you know in your heart, that you did what you could – nothing, no force, could have made you give any less or any more. That is the point in your own evolution and inner growth, when you know that you have peaked, at least for the time being, until life prods you towards the next level. At such a moment, even if the world collapses upon itself, you remain unfazed simply because only you know that every ounce of your strength went into keeping it in motion. If despite that, the collapse took place, it was meant to. But it’s the aftermath that matters. No one likes to be static. The players may change, the spin must return. The cycle can repeat itself ad infinitum. Only, sometimes, one tires of it, or maybe sometimes, one feels that perhaps it is time to rest.
Don’t always look for love when love is so fleeting, so boxed in, so convenient. Live alone, be one with yourself, be stable in your deepest spot within. Take strength from the knowledge of who you are and what you did – you remained selfless; you were the bigger person; you exceeded your own capacity and limit. That is something which should make you proud – not pride as in a pat on the back, well done, swollen head…… no, pride that a test was put forth and you sailed; when you could have chosen from a thousand roads, you took the one that was the hardest but the only one which could save. It didn’t save the relationship but it saved you because you know the effort and the determination with which you walked, an uphill task which only you performed. So take that strength and know that while love is fleeting, while love is strange, while love is really so overrated, it exists.
It exists because you yourself are a symbol of that love.