Fan-Fiction: Crybaby

Artwork By Siddhi Surthe

(A/N: based on Devilman Crybaby) (T/W: violence and death)

This world is coming to an end.

Jin’s footsteps scorch the earth. His gaze burns rivers and razes forests. Oceans evaporate with his every sigh, mountains cave with every exhale. He blinks and cities fall. He blinks again and the ground turns inside out, cracks open to spit fire into the night sky.

This world is coming to an end at Jin’s hands, like he’d planned all along.

Tae struggles to breathe. The air from his lungs rushes out as if escaping him. A pool of red grows larger and larger under him, and he feels it through his skin.

He fought. He fought his best friend. He fought the one person he trusted the most. He fought with all his might because Jin deserved no less. He fought for all of humanity. He fought hard, but he lost.

He tries to rise on his knees. They fail him, dropping him back onto soot. He struggles again, this time to flip onto his back. He struggles, and this time it works. The sky has never been as beautiful as it is now, spinning the stars at blinding speeds. The moon has disappeared, and so has the sun. Nothing remains but distant trails of sparking lights. Tae has the absurd thought of making a wish, and despite his lungs protesting in agony, laughs.

Jin walks into sight, and what a sight it is.

When they were younger, Tae would envy Jin his pristine white wardrobe; his ivory woollen coats and his pale furry jackets. He would always want to run his fingers through Jin’s ashen hair, against his snowy skin, over his crystal capes. Tae grew up envying Jin for the way he looked so pure and perfect, the way his arms always seemed so warm and welcoming. It’s what drew him to Jin, always. It’s what draws him to Jin even now.

But now Jin is changed. His body is beyond perfect, shimmering silver like the only light in the world. He stretches his diamond wings, all eight of them, and in Tae’s dying eyes they span the entire universe. His breasts are supple, and his muscles are sculpted. He does not hide behind three-piece suits and sleek cars anymore. He does not hide his manhood, or his rage. His glance is a violet inferno. His fury is all-consuming, much like his love. He looks more powerful now than he did moments ago as he ended this world and everything in it.

He is man and he is woman. He is god and he is satan. He is one and he is all. He is everything and nothing. But there–on his cheek where Tae managed to make a cut, there is the flaw that ends all admiration. There is the one victory in a million losses, and it puts Tae’s waning heart at ease.

“It didn’t have to be like this,” Jin says, his voice its usual silken tone. But his words are mansions of hatred. He isn’t smiling like he was during battle. “I gave you everything I had, Tae,” he speaks on. “I gave you your power, I gave you your strength and your speed, I gave you your courage. I gave you everything I had, and you threw me to the side. For a boy.”

Tae’s throat is almost all torn away. His tongue feels like a lifeless sponge in his mouth. Blood and bile flood his nostrils. He is drowning. He has been muted–silenced for not being the Tae that Jin wanted him to be. Silenced for the Tae he chose to be instead.

But he is not voiceless.

“I couldn’t–couldn’t do what you wanted me t-to,” Tae coughs, blood spraying from his mouth with every word. “I couldn’t give you what you asked me for, I couldn’t,” he shakes his head. “I couldn’t do it.”

“I loved you!” Jin reminds him, kneeling next to the other. Thunder and lightning crash around them. “I loved you more than I love myself! I loved you! I loved you! I loved you!” he repeats, over and over, slamming his fists against the blazed ground.

“I know…” Tae gulps, nodding and reaching out to touch the other’s face, touching his own chest and patting it.

“Why didn’t you love me back?” Jin demands softly.

Tae’s fangs start to recede. His claws begin to fall away. His skin returns to its usual hue. The power of the devilman is eroding from his veins, never to return. He tries to lift himself up, groaning. Jin pulls him closer, holds him by the back of his neck and caresses his hair away. “I did love you, once,” he mutters. Jin rocks him gently, comforts him in his last moments. “A long time ago, I loved you. And I forgot. But this,” Taemin’s free claw plunges into his chest. He screams as he does it.

Jin’s eyes widen in shock. He stops moving, then. Stops breathing. His hold begins to shudder. “T-Tae!” he shivers out. “Tae!” he clutches at the other’s wrist, trying to stop him, trying to take back his words, trying to reverse time, trying to put the world back in order.

Tae shakes his head gently and the world continues to end. “I forgot,” he rasps. He frees his wrist, holds his arm up, and offers his still-pulsing still-spluttering mess of a heart. “But this reminded me of you.”

Jin closes his wings around them.

This story was about: Homosexuality Identities Sexuality

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Vi. 30. Ace. His walls may still stand a hundred feet tall and unyielding, his sentries may still keep their guns trained on possible intruders. His gate may be locked shut and his moat may be filled with beasts that could tear Jinki to pieces should he so much as dip a toe into the black depths. But everything else that makes Kibum has fallen to pieces. His indomitable fortress protects nothing. There is no one to save and no one to keep alive. He is completely emptied. He belongs completely to Jinki.

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