It’s that time of the year again, and pride is just around the corner * check out Gaysi’s Pride Festivities section *. Since pride is all about the spirit of tolerance and non-discrimination, I have one grouse to pick with the gay community.
Dear Gaysis (& firangaysi), why is bisexuality such a problem?
There was a post on Gaysi a year ago, and the comments section attracted a bit of discussion about bisexuality- not very positive discussion, if I may add.
And I know that’s it’s probably the oldest cliché in the LGBT book, but its true- you’re attracted to/fall in love with a person. Not a sex. At least that’s true for a lot of people. It isn’t always about escapism, or about denial, because sometimes people don’t care for tags or notions.
To the straight world, bisexuals are promiscuous or commitment-phobic, or come straight out of pornos. To the gay community they’re either unwilling to come out of the closet, or merely experimental. Either way, they don’t fit in.
When the gay community tells straight people it’s all about love & expect them to understand & be less judgmental, isn’t it a bit hypocritical to call a bisexual things, or attribute his or her preferences to denial or escapism? If the Ls & the Gs are going to demand conformity (asking them to choose between being straight & gay), then the vast majority are going to ask the same of LGBT.
Just like everything else in life, there isn’t always a black and white, there are a million shades of grey too. Things aren’t always how we like them, nor are they always within our understanding. Which is not to say that they don’t exist.
I’ll speak for myself. I’m not a very girly girl, but I like girly women. The kind that has long, dark hair and wears dresses and the like, but I also like men- talk, dark, extremely masculine men. And this has been on for some years now. Which means it’s not an in-between, making the transition from straight to lesbian phase. My fantasy of a threesome isn’t me with two men, or with two women, my greatest fantasy is a threesome with Jennifer Beals & Sendhil Ramamurthy. And I’ll be with someone I want to be with, dick or pussy. So sue me, I’m a dirty (traitorous) bisexual.
