The XX factor

What does a woman look for in another woman? I could probably ask what a woman looks for in a partner, but I assume it’s not the same thing. I for one, look for very different, almost opposite qualities in men and women. But from what I understand, it probably works differently for gay women.

I’d like the man I’m with to be protective, a little dominating perhaps, and be the provider and that sort of thing. If I’m with a woman, I imagine I’d be all those things.

I’ve been stumped by this little question of mine for quite a while. I’ve come considerably closer to figuring out what men want in women, but I have no answers to this.

I’ll cite myself as a case. It is a fairly well acknowledged fact among those who know me that women like me. Not in a sexual way particularly, they just respond to me a whole lot more. It has happened with all kinds of women- it happened when I was in college, the women at work like me, random people I meet.

But I rarely, if ever, get such a reaction from men. Not that I have issues with men, or that I am not comfortable with them. It’s just that they don’t respond to me in the same way that women do. Which I must admit is very disappointing; especially since finding a gay woman isn’t the easiest thing in the world.

Now this whole business has me very puzzled. I haven’t the faintest clue what that thing is, that makes women love me and makes men think I’m a total retard. If you ask my opinion, it all has its roots in the fact that I think men are far more judgemental and narrow minded in their thinking. So my hair makes men think I’m a weirdo, while women think I’m cool, or I have guts. And so on and so forth.

I think I’ve been rambling all over the place, so back to the original question- What do women look for in other women? Or, what makes a woman popular with other women? If you help me figure that out, I can continue doing what I’m clearly doing right, or wrong. Depending on whether you see it through XX or XY eyes.

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A regular "kaala coat" by day, Jane Doe loves women, and women love her (albeit straight ones). But she also likes men - quite a bit in fact. Just stepping into the real world, she's a little bit of a babe in the woods, but hopes that in a few years she'll be in a position to help change things- whichever side of the rainbow she lands up on.
Jane Doe

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