Your Body Is A Wonderland

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We have always been fascinated with our bodies. Whether it is little John playing with his little John in the kindergarten washroom or Jane stealing her mother’s hand mirror to get a better look at her second set of lips down under, we develop a curiosity about our bodies from an early age. Growing up isn’t just about scraped knees and birthday cakes. It is about nonchalantly placing your pillow on your lap as you play video games with disproportionately curvy characters. It is about discovering that bananas break, but cucumbers don’t. If you are Indian, it is also about finding creative ways to use the bidet spray. And all this is an essential part of growing up.

If you are in a habit of regularly touching yourself it will lead to two awesome things. First, you will discover your pleasure points. When you discover what arouses you and exactly how you feel when you get aroused, you will have a better understanding of what you want in bed. When you have sex with your partner, you will be able to guide them better and your chances of having an orgasm increase. It is important to have wildly satisfying sex because that is the whole point of having sex. Sex is not an act of charity and should never be a chore. For heaven’s sake you are having sex, not washing the dishes!

The second incredible thing that happens when you touch yourself regularly is that you become more aware of your body. You familiarize yourself with every line, curve and sinew of your lovely self. This way you can quickly spot any lumps, legions, abscesses or other aberrations that may be the sign of a greater health concern. So take your time as you feel yourself up. Discover the firmness of your buttocks and the softness of your breasts as you communicate with your body. Talk to your testicles with your thumbs. Have conversations with your clitoris with your fingers. Feel the outer edge of your anus. Be grateful when you discover that you are hemorrhoid-free!

Pleasure is an important part of our being. We are often taught that desire is the root cause of evil. But if there is no desire, there is no motivation to do anything. No inventions, no effort, no improvement, nothing! Are we to just sulk and wait for the end to the boredom and misery? Is that real salvation? We weren’t meant to just give up our happiness and wither away. Do you honour life by despising it? Why is it wrong to want to have fun? If we are to die eventually why not make life a celebration and go out with a big bang? If you seek liberation, it ought to be from baggage such as guilt, pain, fear, regret and shame. Life is not a sentence and your body is not a prison.

Self-discovery is important. One must first journey within to understand the complexities of what lies without… or so say our wise elders. Which means masturbation is sanskaari. And given how often we end up taking our maker’s name as we get closer to the finish line, it cannot be denied that masturbation is a deeply spiritual experience. Hell I even light candles and drink wine when I get into the bathtub to make my Sunday afternoons extra special. Hey you could burn some incense sticks if that’s your thing! But remember to have fun. Your body is a wonderland and it’s time for your next adventure!

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Now 30, 100% shudh desi lesbian. Likes living large, and on the edge. Dislikes stagnation, fence sitting and hypocrites. Lives in a bubble of joy, with occasional lapses into drama queendom. Currently nursing a massive crush on actress Chitrangada Singh (kind of eerie, her resemblance to the late Smita Patil, don’t you think?). Aspires to build a fully functional support system for the Gaysi community in India. And most importantly, top the 'Hottest eligible desi-lezzie' list one bright sunny day.

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