Because this lovely lady asked for our opinion on one of her reader’s plight, and the generous soul that I am who believes in parting with information even when not requested, here are my two bits…
Over the years of my experience as a sexually active self-closeted young teen to out-of-the closet adult to interacting with community online (via Gaysi) to offline (via QAM), what I realized is that sexuality is smooth and uncontainable as beach sand. The more we try to club it in categories or slots for our own simplification, the Queer (pun unintended) it gets. It’s just like the sand slipping out from our fist, the tighter we make our grip.
For instance:
I am a Lesbian who enjoys “watching” heterosexual porn. Yes, shocking indeed! Now all the ladies out there I request you to not cut me off your To Do List. * insert puppy face *.
To those wondering and/or questioning…
1. No, I am not a heterosexual woman posing as a lesbian because I come from a sexually suppressed background.
2. Nor am I a wannabe bisexual
3. Yes I do find (some) men to be physically gorgeous, but so are dogs but this doesn’t mean I want a penis ‘in’ me or for that matter ‘on’ me.
4. I am completely comfortable in a woman’s body (in more ways than one). I love being a woman. Although a cup or two sizes smaller would have saved all that money spent on Compressing Bras.
5. And it is not some kind of a role-playing fantasy. But I personally do recommend it and it can do wonders to your metabolism and HOW!
Truth of the matter is Lesbian porn simply doesn’t get my mojo doing the hula-hoop. The entire “physical” act of a man having sex with a woman gets all the juices flowing in the right direction. Now does this mean I (or others for that matter) should question my knowledge of my own sexuality because of my one preference falls under the category of “Heteronormativity” – well hell no!
Summing it all up in one of most overused phrase – “Sexuality is fluid”. So why not just go with the flow after all we live only once, right?
Exactly,
Trust me I’ll team up with you to knock people down who say “A lady, is “just” posing like a lesbian if she watches “heterosexual porn.” I watch it too, and feelings are nearly similar here as to “why” i watch em. In fact when i told my Best friend (who still is trying to get me out of Homosexuality, thinking it’s a Phase) about me watching “Heterosexual Porn” she said- “See, I told you! you are straight, you are Just confused” And I was like Ökay! Well that’s not the case!
Anyways winding it by saying you are still on my “TO-DO”list
Nice post MJ! My sentiments exactly!
I like het porn for the physical / sexual act. Lez porn is still very much intended to appeal to heterosexual men, not queer girls!
Lez movies / shows like L Word are nice for the feelings, intensity and bonding between female characters & the physical part is nice when it succeeds such bonding on screen!
Guess when it comes to no strings sex watching, I’m very hetero!! But nothing beats a Bette-Tina kiss! Guess thats why I’m Queer!