When I started watching the show Supernatural (2005-2020), I went in with the set ideas about it because it was so largely discussed in my social circles back in 2018. It once again emerged in 2020 when the final season premiered and people had splitting opinions. I’m still on season 10 but I do spend my time on reddit and Instagram to know the major spoilers of the remaining seasons. So fair spoilers warning because I will be discussing them below!

Serious question, who is top in this ship? It’s Cas, isn’t it? Dean’s an immediate dork and stops functioning around Cas so yes if anyone who will be making decisions here, it’s angel Castiel.

Accused Of Queerbaiting and Being ‘Gay’

Desteil has been accused of being queerbaiting by queer fans and been accused of being forcibly gay by homophobes. Both are false! Firstly, I don’t believe that characters that have so much visible chemistry, can queerbait. Secondly, according to the common definition of queerbaiting, the show didn’t get popular on the basis of Destiel, or at least they didn’t have to market the show on the basis of Dean and Cas’ chemistry. And, neither the creator or actors have DENIED the possibility of them getting together.

There are rumors that they even considered making it canon, but scrapped it. Now I would believe it’s because they didn’t want to risk it with the loyal viewers who also had a good number of conservative folks. Which I’m not surprised considering the two main actors are from Texas, and have a plotline that is attractive for a very diverse audience!

The show keeps a lot of things open to your interpretation, all of the actors have also been quite vocal about their individual understanding of their characters. Misha Collins who plays the angel Castiel, has been open about Cas loving Dean romantically. Collins’ interpretation of Castiel feels a lot more queer and relatable to me than a lot of other queer representations on screen. For example, Collins post the backlash on the series finale said,

“Castiel is not a character that plays into any insidious trope of exclusion in Hollywood… In my opinion, Castiel’s declaration of love was done of his own volition, with full knowledge of the consequences of those actions. He went on to rebuild Heaven and his action literally saved the world. By expressing who he really was, by saying this, by making this declaration of love, he literally ends up saving the world, and if that’s not something to celebrate, I don’t know what is.”

And I equally side with Jensen Ackles who plays Dean Winchester, and his interpretation of Dean. For him Dean is someone who isn’t much capable of romantic love, purely because his character carries a boatload of trauma and doesn’t really think Dean is capable of loving Castiel or anyone like that. A lot of fans, who also agree to this, have said that Dean is indeed, emotionally constipated.

I’m on season 10 and I don’t think I’ve seen Dean have serious feelings for ANYONE except Lisa. He swings between love and hate for the world, and has an extremely codependent relationship with his brother because of their shared trauma over a bunch of things.

We saw the uproar in 2020 when the series finale premiered and Cas confessing to Dean led to a massive homophobic tantrum on twitter. So yes, maybe it was wise of show creator/writer Eric Kripe and director/producer Robert Singer to not make Desteil canon.

The Winchester Trauma Dump

Notably, Sam Winchester is also not capable of romantic love. We see him lose his partners to brutal demons, we see him lose his soul and be tortured by literally Lucifer, he almost died every alternate season, he probably isn’t over the fact that his mom died because of him. And not to forget how often he was sexually harassed in the show? Which sadly and wrongly was never addressed?

Besides their personal trauma as individual characters, the show for me, was about two brothers who were navigating the chaotic world, saving people and being absolute nerds. Sam and Dean are known for being extremely loyal to one another. They put each other first in the name of family, they don’t trust anyone except each other and maybe Cas at times. Their bond wasn’t just of normal siblings, but siblings who had unresolved daddy issues, had to kill so many people, watched every parental figure also eventually die, and in result were alcoholics.

So can we blame them if romance is not their strongest suit?

Dean Winchester The Bi-Magnet

You’d be lying if you said every character on the show, villain or not, didn’t inevitably fall in love with Dean Winchester or hated him so much that it was homoerotic. For example, Crowley (King of Hell), Gabriel (Angel, flirted with Cas too), Metatron (Angel, flirted with Cas too), Cole (Human, wanted to kill Dean but gave him a nickname), literally Death (one of the four horsemen of apocalypse), Gadreel (Angel, didn’t kill Dean even on Metatron’s orders), Dick Roman (wanted to kill Dean but wasted time flirting) and Balthazar (a man-slut of an angel). And these are just random ones that came to my mind, there may be more.

Also why I enjoy watching this show, is because nothing about this show is straight for me, all characters LOVE flirting with each other, they love hating each other and chasing each other to death (sometimes).

Destiel Is A Perfect Representation Of Modern Love

Another reason I ship Destiel is because (controversial) they never actually get together. They always have bigger priorities, be it their work, larger duty to their cause, their family and even just trying to survive through another day of chaos. It’s refreshing to see characters who are not trying to get together “against all odds”, they just love each other regardless of where they are, and value each other as companions. Cas never confessing till he knew he won’t see Dean again was absolutely relatable. And of course, from what I know, Dean’s response wasn’t cute either, it was because even he knew it would be the last time they’ll see each other. It was the absolute absence of not saying the right things that makes Destiel so special for me. No one has perfect replies to confessions of love during the apocalypse because all you are looking for is hope.

It’s their imperfect portrayal of love that makes Destiel queer for me. They may not have the bandwidth to love openly, or have the perfect queer relationship (which again is based on a heterosexual framework) but what they have is queer enough!