In our diverse culture with its varied cuisine, food preferences are often shaped by social background, beliefs, aesthetics, or health. The latter two are particularly prevalent in urban spaces such as Mumbai. We set out to explore how queer individuals from the city navigate their food habits. Some have different backgrounds and have recently moved away from the practices that they grew up with!

Religion/Autonomy

In India, a nation with a rich history of vegetarianism *coughs* propaganda *coughs*. The case of “food choices” is a little different. Many adults who move away from home have had complicated relationships with food especially due to religious restrictions. We spoke to Sneha (she/her) (name changed), who was raised in a Jain family, and would’ve had to follow the cardinal rule of Jainism, which doesn’t permit its followers to eat any bulb or underground growing veggies. But it’s been roughly a decade since she started eating meat and has also learnt how to cook it since then!

“I wasn’t particularly religious, I was always questioning things. Despite being a big foodie, I was hesitant to try meat. There was a psychological barrier, mostly due to the conditioning that meat is “impure” and you’re supposed to be disgusted by it.”

When we asked Grace (they/her), a 23-year-old who lives in Mumbai with their aunt, if they’d ever like to go vegan, since they grew up eating and loving meat: “⁠I’ve never considered veganism. I’ve grown up loving non-vegetarian food, my animal-loving, environmentally-responsible self has never felt conflicted with the consumption of meat, nor do I deal with any religious compulsions. It may not be so much of a diet or nutrition requirement but more of a palette inclination, therefore I’ve considered substitutes for monitoring it and having only vegetarian meals on certain days of the week.”

Meat consumption in India is still not as heavily dependent on processed meat, most Indians still rely on butchers for meat, especially, Muslim folx who require Halal meat. Even with vegetables, local grocers and farmers have managed to adapt to the need for certain “exotic” produce.

“It’s been roughly 10 years since I first tried meat, and my parents still don’t know about it. I’ve been regularly told that eating meat is one of the worst things I can do, and I have seen their reactions to other meat-eating people. I think out of all the discriminatory beliefs they have, their dislike for meat consumption is the worst.” Sneha reflects.

Also read: Culinary Therapy: Queer Folx and their Relationship with Food

Aesthetics/Autonomy

Anurag (He/They) grew up not eating meat and depended heavily on milk to help him bulk-up and look more “masculine”. For him, even after incorporating meat (to unlearn casteist ideology of meat eating) in his diet, the bulking-up diet was a disaster in the making. The consequences included acne, IBS, and poor immunity. He says he also felt the stress of wanting to look a certain way, in addition to the stress of falling sick often.

“For 4 years [of college] I had all the meat that I possibly could have had until I started falling sick. I used to follow weird internet diets to gain weight and lose weight or to gain muscle. I was never really a gym ‘bulk-up’ person, but in college I used to work as a model a lot. So,  there were days where I would just not eat at all so that I could look more ripped.”

Sneha, who had to deal with unlearning the guilt and disgust conditioned into her by her family’s beliefs, which is similar to many households, pointed out the aesthetics that often restrict people from learning more about meat-based cuisines.

“I still avoid going to the butcher, simply because the imagery is very jarring for me, but I do cook and eat meat quite frequently. I’ve also unlearnt a lot of the misinformation taught that meat is ‘impure’ or ‘unhygienic’; but now it feels the same as cooking vegetables.”

If you think about it, it’s very similar to how homophobia is conditioned into our minds from a young age. Queerness, like meat-consumption in strict vegetarian households (which are often tied closely to caste) is something to be hidden in the closet.

Also read: I Disliked ‘Annapoorani: The Goddess of Food’ but not for the Reasons it was Taken Down

Nutrition/ Autonomy

Back in the 1990s when India opened up its economy to globalisation, like many other developing countries of the time, it helped save and feed many people. Globalisation allowed many people to access native and international food for lower costs. Over time that has also led to cheapening of the quality of food that we have access to. With “organic” and “clean” foods now being in higher demand, the price of staples inevitably keeps rising too.

Grace says, “Food is fuel to me, I’ve realised that if I have a craving, I just reward my palette. My appetite gets picky/selective based on my moods and mental health, but else, food is fuel.”

Queerness in general comes from the space of wanting to be able to exist without any restrictions. It thrives in creating spaces for yourself with things you like to do, which becomes all the more important in a culture that promotes familial acceptance over individual identity. Especially for queer folx, this doubles as a tendency to suppress  not just bits and pieces of ourselves, but sometimes all of ourselves for the sake of your family’s acceptance.

“I would like to experiment with nice vegan food if I’m in a fancy city. If I’m in a village or if I’m in my hometown I would rather make something at home. If I’m going out somewhere to eat I would love stuff, that I am lucky enough to be living in Bandra, that I have access to ingredients such as vegan butter and cheese and all kinds of plant milk.” Says Anurag.

Ankita (she/her) who started eating meat after moving away from her familial beliefs was still able to move past the commonality of eating meat and switching to a fish-based diet. She says,

⁠“My food philosophy is mindful healthy eating but break the rules occasionally! Choosing what I eat helps me feel more in control & true to myself. ⁠I grew up not eating meat, but I did try it for a couple of years in college. I was always hesitant, but ended up giving it a go during that time. Going pescatarian now feels better for me. The focus is on getting enough nutrition by ensuring a mix of fish, veggies, and whole grains.”

We see how moving away from homes to safer spaces can change how people eat. There was a stereotype in the West that perpetuated that vegetarians/vegans were largely “radical” feminists and lesbians who didn’t like meat. We seem to be witnessing a different approach emerge, when it comes to understanding queerness in relationship with food, especially in urban India. Things are somehow worse and better off right now, with the array of ingredients available, but the scarcity of healthy food continues. Perhaps we’re in a spot that could make or break the way our civilization eats and thinks about food!