Note: This piece mentions weed in a country where it is legal. It does not endorse breaking the law by consuming it where it is illegal.
The first thing you notice when you arrive in Amsterdam is the breathtaking canals, lined with bright pink flowers and coffee shops selling some of the best weed in the world. The second? Sex. And both are equally intriguing to explore.
As a queer traveler, I felt incredibly safe in Amsterdam—so if you’re planning a fun getaway, I’d absolutely recommend it. I went with my bestie (who’s also queer), but this city is just as perfect for a solo adventure or a couple’s trip.
While the Anne Frank House and Van Gogh Museum are probably already on your list, there’s so much more to see. If you’re curious about what else this vibrant city has to offer, let this queer traveler guide the way!
Read: Gaysi Guide To Air Travel As A Genderqueer Person
Sex Museums in Amsterdam
It’s no secret that sex tourism is a big part of Amsterdam, but the problem is that much of it exists through the lens of the cishet male gaze. The Sex Museum and Erotic Museum largely cater to this perspective, though there is one standout exception—a queer and retro-inspired photo series in the Sex Museum.
Erotic art can be hit or miss, and this exhibit is no different. Some parts showcase queer intimacy between women, but in an obviously fetishized way meant for male consumption (eww). However, other images were clearly created by queer artists themselves—and those absolutely deserve all the appreciation.
The museums also feature fascinating ancient artifacts, though the way they are labeled is disappointingly phallocentric. It reminds me of an exhibit at the Vagina Museum in London, which pointed out how archaeologists often label phallic objects as being for “ritualistic purposes” (because, obviously, the dick is everything, right?). When in reality, they were probably just… dildos. These are the kinds of critical observations I wish were present in Amsterdam’s sex museums as well.
A museum that did take a more nuanced approach was the Museum of Prostitution in the Red Light District. It preserves real rooms once used by sex workers, allowing visitors to walk through while listening to firsthand accounts from a real-life sex worker. The narration thoughtfully covers both sex work as a choice and the horrors of sex trafficking, emphasizing the need for reform and legal protection for workers.
Which brings me to one last, important point: If you’re visiting the Red Light District at night, go only if you genuinely intend to pay for services. Do not be a voyeur. The people working there are not a spectacle—they are professionals waiting for clients, and treating them like a tourist attraction is dehumanizing. Imagine someone standing and staring at you while you’re doing your job. If you happen to walk through the district (for example, on your way back from the museum), be respectful. Don’t be creepy. It’s really that simple.
Read: Sex Work And Stalking – My Experience
Queer Attractions and… 🌿🚬👀
While the entire city is incredibly queer-friendly, there are a few spots you’ll definitely want to check out as a queer traveler. Many queer venues unfortunately shut down during the pandemic, but there are still some great bars—The Queen’s Head is a solid recommendation if you’re looking for a fun night out.
I also highly recommend visiting the Homomonument, a memorial dedicated to the queer people who lost their lives during the Holocaust. It’s a solemn yet powerful tribute, and taking a moment to pay respects there felt deeply important while visiting Amsterdam.
And then, of course, there’s the other thing the city is famous for—weed. If you’re planning to partake, my biggest tip is to bring a crusher, lighter, and pre-rolled joints to save yourself both time and money. That way, you can just buy the weed itself and roll it on your own. The staff at coffee shops are super helpful and will guide you based on your experience level and whether you’re looking for an uplifting or relaxing high.
As for space cakes? Definitely tasty, but personally, they didn’t do much for me. The best coffee shop we came across was Boerjongens—highly recommend stopping by!
One small but important note: While a local told us it was okay to smoke in public, we didn’t actually see anyone else doing it. So maybe play it safe and stick to smoking inside the shops. And when the munchies inevitably hit? Get yourself a stroopwafel. I almost proposed to one on this trip. No regrets.
Sex Shops in Amsterdam
If you’re queer and desi like me, chances are that physically walking into a sex shop is a bit of a novelty. Back home, we mostly rely on online stores—or those e-commerce listings that discreetly sell vibrators under the guise of travel-size back massagers for women (anyone else a loyal fan of “DISCREET” packaging?).
So, being in Amsterdam gave me the rare opportunity to step into multiple sex shops, browse in person, and actually ask a real-life human being questions about what would work best for me and my girlfriend!
While Amsterdam’s sex tourism scene leans heavily toward the white cishet male gaze, the sex shops themselves seem to prioritize female pleasure more thoughtfully. There were entire rows dedicated to vibrators and devices focused on clitoral stimulation—to paraphrase Chappell Roan, they’ve got more than a wand and a rabbit! If you’re feeling overwhelmed by the sheer number of options, don’t worry—the staff is usually super kind, progressive, and happy to help you figure out the best choice within your budget.
Since my girlfriend and I are already electronically well-equipped, I was looking for something to add a little extra fun. And here’s where I hit a wall—while there were plenty of options for one woman, there was almost nothing explicitly designed for two. Sure, they had double-sided dildos and vibrators, but when it came to sex games or interactive toys, everything seemed to assume a heterosexual couple.
Read: Self Help is the Best Help—The Autosexual Way
One of the very few sapphic “games” I found was a scratch-off mat with different sex positions that you reveal and then try (if you want). In theory, it sounded fun, but once you’ve scratched off everything—that’s it, right? I wanted something reusable, something we could keep coming back to if we liked it.
The dice games caught my eye because they had multiple combinations and could be played over and over again. But in a sea of dice games for men and women, and a fair selection for gay men, I found exactly one solitary pack designed for two women. That was it. There wasn’t even a gender-neutral version—which absolutely needs to exist. What if the game involved one or more nonbinary people? What if a bi person with multiple partners wanted a game they could play with all of them? The lack of inclusivity was glaring.
After scouring two different stores, I finally asked a staff member if they had a lesbian version of a game I liked. (Side note: I’m not a lesbian, but I wasn’t sure they’d understand the word sapphic.) Turns out, both stores were owned by the same person, and the one lesbian game I had seen earlier was their entire stock. Disappointed but not defeated, I kept browsing. That’s when I spotted something intriguing—an Oral Sex Dice game.
Out of the four dice in the pack, one was dedicated to oral positions, but it was the other three that really caught my attention.
🎲 One die had body parts (chest, legs, etc.).
🎲 Another listed actions (lick, kiss, etc.).
🎲 The third determined the duration (ten seconds, two minutes, etc.).
Since my girlfriend and I had only been dating for a few months, I figured this could be a fun, playful way to explore each other’s erogenous zones and maybe even expand the list of ways we make each other moan. I also picked up a vulva-shaped lollipop for her—mostly because I knew she’d crack up as soon as she saw it. (Guess what, she did!)
When I got home, I showed her the actual gifts first and then pulled out the dice, asking if she’d be into trying them. She was just as curious as I was, so soon enough, we were in bed, rolling the dice and seeing where they led us. Some combos were amazing (chest, lick, thirty seconds). Others? Absolutely hilarious (legs, blow, two minutes). But at the end of the day, the game gave us a new way to explore each other, be playful, and laugh together—which honestly? 10/10, would recommend.
